i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
