Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
