some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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