so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
My dick has a subreddit
Please don't give away my fajitas
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
