i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
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