Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Found the puke drawer
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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