Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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