when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
