Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Randomize
