Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
