Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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