Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize