so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Randomize
