he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
