I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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