I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Randomize
