how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
