she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
