Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
