just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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