i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
