I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
we're making bets on your personal life
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I need mimosas to revive my soul
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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