....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Do vagina's smell?
Four minutes until I can fart!
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
