Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
