It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
splinters make it hard to masturbate
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
