nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
