Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
