My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
