Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
