Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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