they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
