you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
