who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize