i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
