I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
