it's too hot outside to masturbate.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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