That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
