Me too!
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
