omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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