I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
