Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
