On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
one two three fourrrrnication!
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
