Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
