Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
