Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize