I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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