Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
