She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
