This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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