I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
